Happy Easter!!
We are only a quarter through the long Easter weekend and man, I don't think we are going to survive. At least I am not. I am currently trying to enforce my latest parental decision--nap time.
We spent last evening at a friends house dying Easter eggs and eating candy and pizza. We got home had baths and straight to bed. It was an awesome evening--no fuss no muss. As always however, the lateness of bedtime is inversely proportionate to wake up time----the later the bedtime, the earlier the wake up time. So now I have children who were up late and up early. In others words, a perfect storm brewing. I tried to stop the escalation but I can no more stop this then I can stop a tornado. Time to run and take cover.
I am trying to use that old sanity saver, nap/quiet time. It never works for us. Interestingly enough, we are not too bad at bedtime. When it is time for bed my kids go, and if they fuss, cry, or otherwise call out or get up to the bathroom multiple times then the next nights bedtime is moved up by 30 min--and yes I have put my kids to bed at 6pm. Its a good strategy and I feel logical consequence to their actions, but once again their consequences mean I have to do more work. I have dinner ready by five, or skip bath time or not go for an after dinner walk. In short, its a heck of a lot of work just to enforce some "logical' consequences.
Today's debacle started around lunch time. Tired, hungry, whine-y, bored children do not make good company. Tempers flared and tantrums ensued when my children left the table--something I have told them a thousand times not to do--before they were finished their lunch and the dog jumped up on the table and ate their food. There were many tears and a belch from the dog. Not to be left out, my six month old decided she also needed to scream at the top of her lungs because the other two were doing it. I lost it and sent everyone to their rooms for a nap/quiet time.
The very mention of the words room, nap quiet time are enough to cause major meltdowns from my older children. They refused to go to their room. First they lost a star, then a marble and then the big guns-- I started throwing out their stuff. On the plus side, my house is somewhat cleaner because the toys that were laying around are in the garbage. And yes, they are actually in the garbage not coming back. Its my last resort. I no longer yell at them to get to their rooms, I just go around with a garbage bag and throw out stuff until they are in their rooms and quiet (Don't feel too sorry though, most of what I threw out we had duplicates of anyway, but they don't know that.) Finally they settled and we all agreed that they would stay in their rooms for an hour. Except....
My son needed to go the bathroom. Fine. First time--he gets to go, no talking to anyone then straight back to his room. Second time, he can go but the minutes he spends in the bathroom get added to the hour he was supposed to spend in his room. My almost three year old daughter during this time was busy destroying her room. She emptied her closet, dumped her toys. My baby has been crying and fussing this whole time as well, because the other two's tantrums woke her up. I have spent the last hour policing the children (well and writing this so I guess its not all bad).
Now the hour is up and what did I gain? Certainly not well rested children. Another room I have to clean, a messy kitchen and a fussy baby. My kids could not even find the time during all that not napping to get dressed so we can't even go outside. Not really sure what my next move is going to be. Now I have to spend the afternoon cleaning my girl's bedroom (or at least making sure she cleans it) and plotting my revenge. Perhaps another six pm bedtime.................
Good Friday? I don't see what is so good about it.
Friday, April 6, 2012
Sunday, April 1, 2012
I'm Hungry...
Happy April!! I can't believe how time flies. It occurs to me tonight that it has been ages since I have written and I figure its about time I do. Things have been busy here in the frozen north. Since my last post, we have moved our baby in with her big sister and that is presenting some challenges for big sister (and mommy and daddy). However that is a blog for another day. Today I thought I would provide an update on our "Clean Eating" plan.
We are now on week 12 and my husband is down over thirty pounds. I am still down twenty, haven't lost any weight in a while. Its my fault though, because I cheat way more than my husband. How are all of you doing with your resolutions? I must say that I do struggle a little more with the eating plan than my husband, but I know it is worth it in the end. For anyone who is thinking about making a change to their eating habits, here are some of the challenges we have had and how to overcome them. I hope this helps.
The first challenge we faced was that it was expensive. Initially it was. We started buying things like Ezekiel bread--we first had to figure out what it was then figure out where to buy it. Also, because the menus never repeated a meal, they called for many ingredients that were used in one meal then rotted before we rolled around to that meal again. We way over bought produce. We also did not account for things we like and would eat (for example buying the ingredients for a sardine and spinach salad was a wasted expense) In addition we also did not account for things like going out and having leftovers.
The fix? this is a fix to the next challenge as well, but we have decided to stop following a menu plan and automate what we eat. In other words we basically eat the same things every day, so we each week we are buying basically the same things.This makes the grocery list easy to do and the shopping quicker. We now have the layout of the store memorized so we are in an out in about an hour. Previously we would plan each meal for the week then buy the ingredients to make each meal. Not a bad way to do things, but I find on a Sunday morning that last thing I want to do is think about the next seven days of supper. Now I am making suppers that have a protein source, salad and a couple of vegetables and a grain. So now each week I buy two kinds of fish--usually salmon and talipa, two red meats usually pork and fast fry steak--or whatever is on for about four dollars. Sometimes I will buy one large T-bone or Sirloin and cut it into four pieces or cook it and cut it up for a Thai beef salad. I also get two pre-cooked BBQ chickens (the hot ones ) I take the skin off of them and cut up the chicken in a container in the fridge. This then becomes the lunch meat for sandwiches, the protein for salads and wraps and the topping for pizza or filling for fajitas. I also keep some sort of ground meat in the freezer--usually extra lean beef or chicken or turkey.
For vegetables it is hard to find ones we like, but so far we are enjoying broccoli rabe, asparagus carrots and celery. For fruit we buy apples, oranges bosc pears and bananas we eat loads of bananas. We also buy a fair amount of frozen berries--blueberries, mango and strawberries. Round it out with some milk, plain greek yogurt and some kids stuff like cereal, whole wheat bread for sandwiches, and wraps. We also get almond butter or all natural peanut butter, and some sort of beans--black or pinto or kidney. That's basically the list, more or less the same each week--we are coming in around $150 dollars which is way better than the $350 we spent the first few time we did this.
The next challenge we faced is the time commitment. At first and as I have posted before, suppers were taking over two hours to prepare because many recipes had many ingredients (most of which I did not know what they were let alone how to cook them). Now I find that dinner takes about 10 minutes or so to prepare--the meat cooks in about 10min and sometimes we don't bother to cook the vegetables so they go from fridge to plate. I am starting to love dinner again. Packing school lunch takes no time either. We usually pack a cheese string or two, a "cutie" orange, a pear, a sandwich and a banana, and two drinking boxes. I know, we should be packing milk, but we have a special request for drinking boxes and since my poor child is coping with the loss of his beloved "lunchables" I don't have the heart to take away the juice or-- gasp--sometimes kool aid.
So now you might be asking what we eat in a day. Well I can tell you that if I spend ten minutes on dinner I don't spend that time on breakfast or lunch. Here is our basic meal plan. It may sound boring and to some extent it is, but it is easy. Plus, there are millions of combinations to the same basic outline for the day. For breakfast: Smoothie. I was never one for smoothies until I started drinking them. Now I love them for many reasons. They are quick, easy, can have them on the go, on the phone, while feeding a baby..and they are so tasty. There are millions of combinations to go in a smoothie, so no need to get bored. Morning snack: Fruit with a table spoon of almond butter. Lunch: Salad and a fruit. Yeah I know, but salad is quick to prepare (we buy pre washed baby spinach and pre washed spring mix) and again, lots of combinations. Afternoon snack: Green tea and fruit with almond butter. Supper as I mentioned above, a meat a salad and a vegetable. Bedtime snack: Either oatmeal with berries and protein powder or three cups light organic microwave popcorn. Of course, plenty of water. This is how my husband has lost thirty pounds and is now a couple of pounds below his goal weight.
My challenges have been that I am skipping the all important snacks, so then that leads to hunger and once I am hungry, I am ordering pizza or going to MacDonald's. So starting tomorrow, I am renewing my commitment to eat six times a day (small meals). However, if I find myself at a restaurant and craving funnel cake, I am going to get the funnel cake. I believe that this is not an all or nothing endeavor. Its what you do most of the time that counts. If you are wanting to make a change to your eating habits but don't because of the obstacles, I hope you will find hope in our plan and try it for yourself. I would love to know how it works for others. Also I would love any comments on simple ways you have found to eat healthy with little time and little money. We are in this together.
We are now on week 12 and my husband is down over thirty pounds. I am still down twenty, haven't lost any weight in a while. Its my fault though, because I cheat way more than my husband. How are all of you doing with your resolutions? I must say that I do struggle a little more with the eating plan than my husband, but I know it is worth it in the end. For anyone who is thinking about making a change to their eating habits, here are some of the challenges we have had and how to overcome them. I hope this helps.
The first challenge we faced was that it was expensive. Initially it was. We started buying things like Ezekiel bread--we first had to figure out what it was then figure out where to buy it. Also, because the menus never repeated a meal, they called for many ingredients that were used in one meal then rotted before we rolled around to that meal again. We way over bought produce. We also did not account for things we like and would eat (for example buying the ingredients for a sardine and spinach salad was a wasted expense) In addition we also did not account for things like going out and having leftovers.
The fix? this is a fix to the next challenge as well, but we have decided to stop following a menu plan and automate what we eat. In other words we basically eat the same things every day, so we each week we are buying basically the same things.This makes the grocery list easy to do and the shopping quicker. We now have the layout of the store memorized so we are in an out in about an hour. Previously we would plan each meal for the week then buy the ingredients to make each meal. Not a bad way to do things, but I find on a Sunday morning that last thing I want to do is think about the next seven days of supper. Now I am making suppers that have a protein source, salad and a couple of vegetables and a grain. So now each week I buy two kinds of fish--usually salmon and talipa, two red meats usually pork and fast fry steak--or whatever is on for about four dollars. Sometimes I will buy one large T-bone or Sirloin and cut it into four pieces or cook it and cut it up for a Thai beef salad. I also get two pre-cooked BBQ chickens (the hot ones ) I take the skin off of them and cut up the chicken in a container in the fridge. This then becomes the lunch meat for sandwiches, the protein for salads and wraps and the topping for pizza or filling for fajitas. I also keep some sort of ground meat in the freezer--usually extra lean beef or chicken or turkey.
For vegetables it is hard to find ones we like, but so far we are enjoying broccoli rabe, asparagus carrots and celery. For fruit we buy apples, oranges bosc pears and bananas we eat loads of bananas. We also buy a fair amount of frozen berries--blueberries, mango and strawberries. Round it out with some milk, plain greek yogurt and some kids stuff like cereal, whole wheat bread for sandwiches, and wraps. We also get almond butter or all natural peanut butter, and some sort of beans--black or pinto or kidney. That's basically the list, more or less the same each week--we are coming in around $150 dollars which is way better than the $350 we spent the first few time we did this.
The next challenge we faced is the time commitment. At first and as I have posted before, suppers were taking over two hours to prepare because many recipes had many ingredients (most of which I did not know what they were let alone how to cook them). Now I find that dinner takes about 10 minutes or so to prepare--the meat cooks in about 10min and sometimes we don't bother to cook the vegetables so they go from fridge to plate. I am starting to love dinner again. Packing school lunch takes no time either. We usually pack a cheese string or two, a "cutie" orange, a pear, a sandwich and a banana, and two drinking boxes. I know, we should be packing milk, but we have a special request for drinking boxes and since my poor child is coping with the loss of his beloved "lunchables" I don't have the heart to take away the juice or-- gasp--sometimes kool aid.
So now you might be asking what we eat in a day. Well I can tell you that if I spend ten minutes on dinner I don't spend that time on breakfast or lunch. Here is our basic meal plan. It may sound boring and to some extent it is, but it is easy. Plus, there are millions of combinations to the same basic outline for the day. For breakfast: Smoothie. I was never one for smoothies until I started drinking them. Now I love them for many reasons. They are quick, easy, can have them on the go, on the phone, while feeding a baby..and they are so tasty. There are millions of combinations to go in a smoothie, so no need to get bored. Morning snack: Fruit with a table spoon of almond butter. Lunch: Salad and a fruit. Yeah I know, but salad is quick to prepare (we buy pre washed baby spinach and pre washed spring mix) and again, lots of combinations. Afternoon snack: Green tea and fruit with almond butter. Supper as I mentioned above, a meat a salad and a vegetable. Bedtime snack: Either oatmeal with berries and protein powder or three cups light organic microwave popcorn. Of course, plenty of water. This is how my husband has lost thirty pounds and is now a couple of pounds below his goal weight.
My challenges have been that I am skipping the all important snacks, so then that leads to hunger and once I am hungry, I am ordering pizza or going to MacDonald's. So starting tomorrow, I am renewing my commitment to eat six times a day (small meals). However, if I find myself at a restaurant and craving funnel cake, I am going to get the funnel cake. I believe that this is not an all or nothing endeavor. Its what you do most of the time that counts. If you are wanting to make a change to your eating habits but don't because of the obstacles, I hope you will find hope in our plan and try it for yourself. I would love to know how it works for others. Also I would love any comments on simple ways you have found to eat healthy with little time and little money. We are in this together.
Sunday, March 11, 2012
I was such a good parent before I had kids
"I am setting the timer for 10 minutes. Whoever is not ready, does not go the hockey game." This is how we begin most trips out of our house. It is a source of huge frustration for me. It should be simple, pick a time to leave, put coats on put shoes on and go...Yeah right. For some reason, when I say its time to get ready, my family (husband included) think it means stand around, or in the case of the children run around in all different directions until I have the baby ready and my stuff on. Then they choose that moment to go to the bathroom, put the dog out, get coats on, etc. Then I get blamed for holding everyone up. Its true I am always the last one out of the house because I am cleaning the kitchen, making sure the pets are locked downstairs and getting the baby ready. I try to give my family the ten minute warning--which as I said my family thinks it means wait until the ten minutes are up and then get ready..Sigh
Tonight was going to be our third night out of the house--we were going to a hockey game about an hour drive from Timmins. Jeff and I agreed we would leave at 6. We had dinner at 5 and the kids even helped clean up. We did not tell them about the game until the 10 minute warning. They were super excited. My son to my surprise got ready, but my wonderful two year old decided instead to strip her clothes off and run around naked. The timer of course went off, and my son actually asked for an extension for his sister so she could get ready. Despite repeated warnings for my daughter to get dressed and some raised voices I finally convinced Jeff to go without her. My two year old managed to delay departure time until 6:30. Now its 7 pm beautifully light out and warm and I would like to go for a walk..but I have a naked two year old to contend with. Double sigh.
Its situations like this that make me question my parenting skills and my sanity. On one hand, I know I have to stick to what I said, and my girl did not get ready so she did not go. In fact she should not have had a half hour of chances but Jeff was reluctant to leave because he wanted to give me some quiet time by taking our older two. He took the baby so once my two year old goes to sleep I should have the quiet time. As a natural consequence of not getting ready my middle child missed the hockey game. Good discipline, right? Except that she is not upset about missing the game. In fact there were no tears, nothing. Of course she is not upset. Now she has mommy all to herself (or at least she will when I am done writing this). Smart girl.
Is it too early to admit defeat? Is it wrong to admit that as much as she frustrates me I am secretly proud? I love her persistence and stubbornness--when it doesn't affect me--It is what will take her far in life and hopefully she will never give up until she achieves her goals and dreams but right now, it sucks. This child is truly smarter than me. I have no idea how to impose a natural consequence without inadvertently rewarding the behavior. Triple sigh. The star chart is working very well for our oldest child, but my clever two year old has decided she does not want or need stars. She does respond when her favorite bear is taken away, but if I am afraid if I do that too often she will just decide she doesn't need bear anyway.
I used to be smart. Before I had kids, I read books, I subscribe to theories--I have always liked the attachment theory of parenting. We talked about discipline, I knew exactly how I would handle my kids when they misbehaved. I was so smart, so informed that I even knew what other parents were doing wrong. I would see them ignoring their kids in the mall, or yelling in a restaurant and I would feel sorry those people couldn't handle their kids. Now I will consider myself lucky if I am not bailing one of my monsters out of jail in a few years. I was such a better parent before I had kids.
Tonight was going to be our third night out of the house--we were going to a hockey game about an hour drive from Timmins. Jeff and I agreed we would leave at 6. We had dinner at 5 and the kids even helped clean up. We did not tell them about the game until the 10 minute warning. They were super excited. My son to my surprise got ready, but my wonderful two year old decided instead to strip her clothes off and run around naked. The timer of course went off, and my son actually asked for an extension for his sister so she could get ready. Despite repeated warnings for my daughter to get dressed and some raised voices I finally convinced Jeff to go without her. My two year old managed to delay departure time until 6:30. Now its 7 pm beautifully light out and warm and I would like to go for a walk..but I have a naked two year old to contend with. Double sigh.
Its situations like this that make me question my parenting skills and my sanity. On one hand, I know I have to stick to what I said, and my girl did not get ready so she did not go. In fact she should not have had a half hour of chances but Jeff was reluctant to leave because he wanted to give me some quiet time by taking our older two. He took the baby so once my two year old goes to sleep I should have the quiet time. As a natural consequence of not getting ready my middle child missed the hockey game. Good discipline, right? Except that she is not upset about missing the game. In fact there were no tears, nothing. Of course she is not upset. Now she has mommy all to herself (or at least she will when I am done writing this). Smart girl.
Is it too early to admit defeat? Is it wrong to admit that as much as she frustrates me I am secretly proud? I love her persistence and stubbornness--when it doesn't affect me--It is what will take her far in life and hopefully she will never give up until she achieves her goals and dreams but right now, it sucks. This child is truly smarter than me. I have no idea how to impose a natural consequence without inadvertently rewarding the behavior. Triple sigh. The star chart is working very well for our oldest child, but my clever two year old has decided she does not want or need stars. She does respond when her favorite bear is taken away, but if I am afraid if I do that too often she will just decide she doesn't need bear anyway.
I used to be smart. Before I had kids, I read books, I subscribe to theories--I have always liked the attachment theory of parenting. We talked about discipline, I knew exactly how I would handle my kids when they misbehaved. I was so smart, so informed that I even knew what other parents were doing wrong. I would see them ignoring their kids in the mall, or yelling in a restaurant and I would feel sorry those people couldn't handle their kids. Now I will consider myself lucky if I am not bailing one of my monsters out of jail in a few years. I was such a better parent before I had kids.
Monday, February 27, 2012
Decisions, Decisions....
I am currently enjoying the off key sounds of "O Canada" as I sit here to write this. I don't think my son is going to win "American Idol" anytime soon. Every once in a while my daughter joins in with a chorus of "Daaaaaddddeeeeee!!!!" They are in bed not sleeping because in a moment of weakness I allowed them to share a slushie at supper. So naturally I have two hyper children who are grudgingly in their beds but are singing themselves to sleep. Sigh.
It seemed like such a good idea that the time. Get out of the house for a while, have supper at the food court and while we are at the mall, get marbles for the new reward chart we started with the kids. Simple right? I should have gone myself alone, but I told the kids if they earned their first marbles then we could go and get the marbles together. They had great behavior on the weekend, so we decided to go today after school. We also picked the worst possible day weather wise, but since we only live a few blocks from the mall I didn't think it was a big deal.
Our adventure began trying to get out the door. For my friends who have older kids, you might remember this, for my friends who have younger kids, any advice is welcome. It takes us at least 30 min to get out the door. There is a real science to getting out the door with kids. The natural instinct is to get the kids ready, then get your coat on then go....But its not that easy. By the time the last kid is ready the first kid is screaming cause she is hot (Sophie) and the second kid has stripped off the coat, hat and mittens so carefully applied and is working on her boots (Stella) and the third kid hasn't even got his coat on...I have cancelled many a trip because we can't get out the door, Although even this is easier said then done because sometimes we have to go.
We did manage to pile into the Mackie bus and we made it to the mall. Our first stop was the dollar store. We searched the dollar store for marbles to no avail. My son suggested we go to Canadian Tire, but I wanted to stay at the mall so we could eat. Surely, I thought some store in the mall would sell marbles. I thought wrong. We ate our supper at the food court and piled back in the van to go to Canadian Tire. Success at last. Now that we had the marbles, we needed jars to put the marbles in. The kids were really into it. We picked out these little condiment jars for them to hold their marbles (The slushies were kicking in by now, so I was starting to loose my marbles ). Back home we came. What should have taken an hour actually took 3.
We skipped the baths and the kids rushed into their jammies so they could put their hard earned marbles into their new jars. How do they earn marbles you ask? Well, we have implemented a star chart for the kids, similar to the technique used in Jonas' class. Every day the kids have a chance to earn a star for doing certain things like getting ready in the morning (Jonas), cleaning up and staying in bed at night (Stella) every time the kids get three stars, they earn a marble. When they get 10 marbles they get a prize--Jonas' first prize will be a clock radio. I know what you are thinking and I have the same dilemma. I shouldn't bribe my kids to get them to behave. On the other hand, I am trying to build self esteem and reward the behavior I want to see. Plus it beats screaming at them all the time (My throat is getting sore). So far so good, they are really into it. Also it gives me something to take away when they don't behave, like for example, they are told to go sleep and they are singing and yelling instead.....
This is the decision I am currently struggling with, whether to take away a star (and therefore a marble because then they haven't got three stars today) and risk the fights and the temper tantrums (which will keep the kids up even later) or just let them sing themselves to sleep because after all they are in bed, and staying there at least for now. We narrowly avoided a melt down when Stella's brand new marble jar broke because she was shaking it. Then apparently the jar we bough for Jonas did not make it out of the cart and is probably still sitting at the cash register at Canadian Tire. So we are using two old mason jars I had in the cupboard. Yeah, I know I could have save myself a lot of time and effort if I had just looked in the damn cupboard first and if I had just decided to use stickers instead of marbles (That would have been a lot quieter too).
Lucky for me I have kids who are easily amused. They had a great time with us, and were pretty excited about their marbles, despite the broken jar, the missing jar. Of course that could just be the slushie high talking and they will be miserable tomorrow. For now I am going to let them enjoy. At least I got out of the house and did not have to cook dinner. If you are wondering, Jeff and I had subway salads at the food court. I was very tempted by A&W but I am 20 lbs down now and want to keep going strong. I did however have a couple of bites of the kid's pizza.....
It seemed like such a good idea that the time. Get out of the house for a while, have supper at the food court and while we are at the mall, get marbles for the new reward chart we started with the kids. Simple right? I should have gone myself alone, but I told the kids if they earned their first marbles then we could go and get the marbles together. They had great behavior on the weekend, so we decided to go today after school. We also picked the worst possible day weather wise, but since we only live a few blocks from the mall I didn't think it was a big deal.
Our adventure began trying to get out the door. For my friends who have older kids, you might remember this, for my friends who have younger kids, any advice is welcome. It takes us at least 30 min to get out the door. There is a real science to getting out the door with kids. The natural instinct is to get the kids ready, then get your coat on then go....But its not that easy. By the time the last kid is ready the first kid is screaming cause she is hot (Sophie) and the second kid has stripped off the coat, hat and mittens so carefully applied and is working on her boots (Stella) and the third kid hasn't even got his coat on...I have cancelled many a trip because we can't get out the door, Although even this is easier said then done because sometimes we have to go.
We did manage to pile into the Mackie bus and we made it to the mall. Our first stop was the dollar store. We searched the dollar store for marbles to no avail. My son suggested we go to Canadian Tire, but I wanted to stay at the mall so we could eat. Surely, I thought some store in the mall would sell marbles. I thought wrong. We ate our supper at the food court and piled back in the van to go to Canadian Tire. Success at last. Now that we had the marbles, we needed jars to put the marbles in. The kids were really into it. We picked out these little condiment jars for them to hold their marbles (The slushies were kicking in by now, so I was starting to loose my marbles ). Back home we came. What should have taken an hour actually took 3.
We skipped the baths and the kids rushed into their jammies so they could put their hard earned marbles into their new jars. How do they earn marbles you ask? Well, we have implemented a star chart for the kids, similar to the technique used in Jonas' class. Every day the kids have a chance to earn a star for doing certain things like getting ready in the morning (Jonas), cleaning up and staying in bed at night (Stella) every time the kids get three stars, they earn a marble. When they get 10 marbles they get a prize--Jonas' first prize will be a clock radio. I know what you are thinking and I have the same dilemma. I shouldn't bribe my kids to get them to behave. On the other hand, I am trying to build self esteem and reward the behavior I want to see. Plus it beats screaming at them all the time (My throat is getting sore). So far so good, they are really into it. Also it gives me something to take away when they don't behave, like for example, they are told to go sleep and they are singing and yelling instead.....
This is the decision I am currently struggling with, whether to take away a star (and therefore a marble because then they haven't got three stars today) and risk the fights and the temper tantrums (which will keep the kids up even later) or just let them sing themselves to sleep because after all they are in bed, and staying there at least for now. We narrowly avoided a melt down when Stella's brand new marble jar broke because she was shaking it. Then apparently the jar we bough for Jonas did not make it out of the cart and is probably still sitting at the cash register at Canadian Tire. So we are using two old mason jars I had in the cupboard. Yeah, I know I could have save myself a lot of time and effort if I had just looked in the damn cupboard first and if I had just decided to use stickers instead of marbles (That would have been a lot quieter too).
Lucky for me I have kids who are easily amused. They had a great time with us, and were pretty excited about their marbles, despite the broken jar, the missing jar. Of course that could just be the slushie high talking and they will be miserable tomorrow. For now I am going to let them enjoy. At least I got out of the house and did not have to cook dinner. If you are wondering, Jeff and I had subway salads at the food court. I was very tempted by A&W but I am 20 lbs down now and want to keep going strong. I did however have a couple of bites of the kid's pizza.....
Sunday, February 19, 2012
Hello Darkness My Old Friend...
Hear my words that I might teach you; Take my arms that I might reach you
--Simon and Garfunkel
I know you are there. I see you have come to visit me once again. I was beginning to think you weren't coming. Silly me, I should have known you couldn't stay away. We have been through a lot together. You have been there for so many of my major milestones--Its hard for me to remember when we met. It was probably back when I was a plucky young nursing student who did not believe you really exist. I thought you were made up by drug companies to sell medication. You appeared from nowhere and you must of liked me cause you stuck around. When my grandfather died and when I failed out of nursing school and stayed on the couch for two months you were there waiting in the shadows, so quiet I did not know you were there.
You were there when I became a mom for the first time, again so quiet I really did not know you were there. I did not feel sad, just angry. I thought every new mom gets frustrated and angry and hates their husbands from time to time. I should have known it was you after all, I read about you, people asked about you during the early weeks, but you cleverly waited until after the six week check up to appear. You also would go away and come back that I did not realize you were there, silly me.
By the time my second child came you had enough of being quiet. You decided to make your presence known. I was not expecting you so I was not ready when you made your grand entrance. I dismissed the thoughts I had of dropping my baby daughter down the stairs as "just one of those things" When I thought about stabbing my son, I figured it was because I was standing in the kitchen putting away the knives and he happened to be there. Never in my wildest dreams did I think it was you. That's how good you were at insinuating yourself into my life I never knew you were there. I thought all mothers had crazy thoughts from time to time. All mothers lie awake at night unable to sleep because they are convinced their babies will stop breathing if they fall asleep. God forbid I should leave the room while my child is sleeping, she might suffocate while I am gone. New mothers have a lot to worry about and you made sure I worried about every single thing. You made me afraid to bathe my children because every time they were in the tub I would think about them drowning accidentally, then I would think about drowning them. You made sure that even when things were good I couldn't enjoy it because I was too guilty for my bad thoughts and I was too worried about how to avoid you.
I tried to run away from you, but that didn't work. You came with me, didn't you? Always with me. I tried to wish you away, I tried to exercise you away, I tried to eat my way away from you. Even the medication did not make you go away. So I learned to live with you, I stopped fighting you, stopped worrying about you. I had help of course, and with time and therapy you gradually went away. One day I turned around and you were gone. Can't really say I missed you, it was much more like good riddance.
Now I am a mom for the third time and you have come back. You know what? that's ok. Its the middle of winter and I know you have lots of people to visit. Thank you for giving me four glorious months with my daughter, where I haven't had to think about you once. Now I worry that when I loose my temper its because of you, when I am sad, I will wonder if I am just sad or if it is because of you. You are the master of making people worry, aren't you? I think this time you will find a different person than you did last time, for I have learned (the hard way) that it is not me, its you. Despite your best efforts, I am a good mom and I have people who love me. I have three amazing kids and you don't make me love them any less. I know the more I talk about you, write about you the less power you will have over me. When you went away last time, I saw the joy in my kids. They went from annoying to adorable (well most of the time :) ) So I say to you now, bring it on. I know that you won't be around all that long. This time I know you are there and you will not take my kids mom, not again.
Silence like a cancer grows
---Simon and Garfunkel
For everyone dealing with depression, please talk to someone. It doesn't have to get worse from here. For my mommy friends, check out this link:
http://www.helpformom.ca/
--Simon and Garfunkel
I know you are there. I see you have come to visit me once again. I was beginning to think you weren't coming. Silly me, I should have known you couldn't stay away. We have been through a lot together. You have been there for so many of my major milestones--Its hard for me to remember when we met. It was probably back when I was a plucky young nursing student who did not believe you really exist. I thought you were made up by drug companies to sell medication. You appeared from nowhere and you must of liked me cause you stuck around. When my grandfather died and when I failed out of nursing school and stayed on the couch for two months you were there waiting in the shadows, so quiet I did not know you were there.
You were there when I became a mom for the first time, again so quiet I really did not know you were there. I did not feel sad, just angry. I thought every new mom gets frustrated and angry and hates their husbands from time to time. I should have known it was you after all, I read about you, people asked about you during the early weeks, but you cleverly waited until after the six week check up to appear. You also would go away and come back that I did not realize you were there, silly me.
By the time my second child came you had enough of being quiet. You decided to make your presence known. I was not expecting you so I was not ready when you made your grand entrance. I dismissed the thoughts I had of dropping my baby daughter down the stairs as "just one of those things" When I thought about stabbing my son, I figured it was because I was standing in the kitchen putting away the knives and he happened to be there. Never in my wildest dreams did I think it was you. That's how good you were at insinuating yourself into my life I never knew you were there. I thought all mothers had crazy thoughts from time to time. All mothers lie awake at night unable to sleep because they are convinced their babies will stop breathing if they fall asleep. God forbid I should leave the room while my child is sleeping, she might suffocate while I am gone. New mothers have a lot to worry about and you made sure I worried about every single thing. You made me afraid to bathe my children because every time they were in the tub I would think about them drowning accidentally, then I would think about drowning them. You made sure that even when things were good I couldn't enjoy it because I was too guilty for my bad thoughts and I was too worried about how to avoid you.
I tried to run away from you, but that didn't work. You came with me, didn't you? Always with me. I tried to wish you away, I tried to exercise you away, I tried to eat my way away from you. Even the medication did not make you go away. So I learned to live with you, I stopped fighting you, stopped worrying about you. I had help of course, and with time and therapy you gradually went away. One day I turned around and you were gone. Can't really say I missed you, it was much more like good riddance.
Now I am a mom for the third time and you have come back. You know what? that's ok. Its the middle of winter and I know you have lots of people to visit. Thank you for giving me four glorious months with my daughter, where I haven't had to think about you once. Now I worry that when I loose my temper its because of you, when I am sad, I will wonder if I am just sad or if it is because of you. You are the master of making people worry, aren't you? I think this time you will find a different person than you did last time, for I have learned (the hard way) that it is not me, its you. Despite your best efforts, I am a good mom and I have people who love me. I have three amazing kids and you don't make me love them any less. I know the more I talk about you, write about you the less power you will have over me. When you went away last time, I saw the joy in my kids. They went from annoying to adorable (well most of the time :) ) So I say to you now, bring it on. I know that you won't be around all that long. This time I know you are there and you will not take my kids mom, not again.
Silence like a cancer grows
---Simon and Garfunkel
For everyone dealing with depression, please talk to someone. It doesn't have to get worse from here. For my mommy friends, check out this link:
http://www.helpformom.ca/
Sunday, February 12, 2012
If Only I had known then...
As I sit here listening to my children crying and calling "Mommy" I am fighting the urge to do two things. My first instinct is go up there, find out what is wrong and fix it so they can go to sleep (They have been in bed crying now for about an hour). But that would just teach them that crying and persistence pays off. My second instinct is to go up there, scream at the top of my lungs and give them the mother of all spankings, but then I would just have to listen to more crying (and probably louder). So I will sit here writing this and ignoring the cries as all good moms do. I am reminded of a piece I wrote on Jeff's blog when Jonas was 11 months old, and I figured I would repost it, because it still applies whether you have one child or three. This is for all my first time mom friends (the things your friends never told you) and all my experienced mom friends..remember when we thought we knew what we were doing? Don't you wish someone would have told you? Enjoy!!
I would like to share with you the top 10 things I wish someone had told me about having a baby (in no
particular order):
1. Your hips stay that size--yep, your hip hugger jeans will be a long time fitting again...Now I know why moms wear mom jeans
2. Having a baby makes you hate your husband--I don't know if its hormones, but one day you look at him and think--Wow! how could I marry someone like him (Don't worry though, it passes--eventually. Right, Jeff honey :) )
3. Your stomach will look like a 3D road map-complete with canyons and rivers
4. Your normally wonderful parents turn into grandparents!!--Ok I knew that one, but still I was not prepared for such wisdom as "Your baby cant tell you when hes cold" and "I used to worry about you and the baby but then I realized your are not a complete idiot and probably won't screw up too much"--Love you too, mom
5. Fundal Massage is not nearly as fun as it sounds
6. Your biggest joy will be when your baby stops pooing green
7. You will proudly wear baby vomit/urine/feeces as though they were the latest acessory--Lets see Paris Hilton or Kim Kardashian top that!
8. You will never have sex again--see points 2 and 3
9. Sleep is for idiots
10. When the sun finally shines again, you will shut the blinds and go to sleep.
My love and praise to all the Mommies out there!! As a wise friend once said, Mommies are the best!
I would like to share with you the top 10 things I wish someone had told me about having a baby (in no
particular order):
1. Your hips stay that size--yep, your hip hugger jeans will be a long time fitting again...Now I know why moms wear mom jeans
2. Having a baby makes you hate your husband--I don't know if its hormones, but one day you look at him and think--Wow! how could I marry someone like him (Don't worry though, it passes--eventually. Right, Jeff honey :) )
3. Your stomach will look like a 3D road map-complete with canyons and rivers
4. Your normally wonderful parents turn into grandparents!!--Ok I knew that one, but still I was not prepared for such wisdom as "Your baby cant tell you when hes cold" and "I used to worry about you and the baby but then I realized your are not a complete idiot and probably won't screw up too much"--Love you too, mom
5. Fundal Massage is not nearly as fun as it sounds
6. Your biggest joy will be when your baby stops pooing green
7. You will proudly wear baby vomit/urine/feeces as though they were the latest acessory--Lets see Paris Hilton or Kim Kardashian top that!
8. You will never have sex again--see points 2 and 3
9. Sleep is for idiots
10. When the sun finally shines again, you will shut the blinds and go to sleep.
My love and praise to all the Mommies out there!! As a wise friend once said, Mommies are the best!
Saturday, February 4, 2012
The Honeymoon is over...(Eating Clean can suck it)
Well my friends it has happened. I think we all knew it would sooner or later. I have hit a wall with the new eating plan. I can admit it now, it sucks. The first week I felt awesome and I lost 5 pounds...even more awesome. Second week I felt great and lost another 5 pounds..even greater. Then in the third week I cheated a bit and did not loose any weight. I also started to feel not so great, and this the end of week 4 I have not lost weight and I feel like crap. Sigh.
On the bright side, we are still eating healthy colorful dinners. The problem is, I am spending hours in the kitchen. Tonight supper took me an hour and a half to prepare. The kicker is it was fish. Who the heck spends an hour and half on fish? While it was tasty, it was not filling and now I am eating a bedtime snack (which is allowed under the plan). I have also just spent and hour making my grocery list for our weekly shop tomorrow. Grocery shopping used to take us--or Jeff and the kids I should say cause they were the ones doing it--about an hour. Now it takes two hours and that is with us dividing up the list. The list is long and because we shop at an inexpensive grocery store, it is hard to find substitutes for the ingredients not available at that store. If we do the shopping at a store where we can buy things like Quinoa, Tahani and Mori Nu tofu, we end up spending well over $300. I am also bummed because I found out last night on a TV show that the sandwich meat I was buying is not as healthy as I thought. I don't want to name any product, but there is a brand of meat which lists the ingredients as lemon juice, sea salt and cultured celery extract. In case you don't know, cultured celery extract is just another name for nitrate. In fact this meat is no more healthy then the obviously bad for you kind. Another Sigh.
So what is a slightly postpartum depressed--tired--hungry--sick of being in the kitchen--mom to do? No I don't have time to go to three different stores to get the stuff I need ( This includes going to a store with a deli or an actual deli) So no more lunch meat, Jonas will be so disappointed. Peanut butter and jam is out too, as Jonas' school is seed and nut free. Jonas will just have to survive on leftovers. I have decided each week I will just buy a roast beef or a chicken, cook them in my crock pot and use that for Jonas' lunch meat. I am also going to try cooking several things at the same time--like roasting beets for a later in the week salad when I bake the sweet potatoes for that nights meal. I am hoping this will save time at least later
in the week. I am also going to splurge on a veggie tray..They are obviously more expensive then buying whole veggies and cutting them yourself, but the time savings is valuable. Plus, you have the advantage of always having fresh prepared food ready for a snack. I am a huge fan of grab and go food. It also helps to remember that it is just as easy to make a lot of something as it is to make a little. In other words, its just as easy to cook nine chicken breasts as it is to make four, so the leftovers can be used in a salad, a wrap or my kids favourite on a pizza. I am really open to other suggestions any of you may have to save time and money so please feel free to post your tips here or on my facebook page. If you prefer you can message me your tips and I will post them.
At the end of the day, I must remember that this is a lifestyle change, not a diet. There is no going back. I will find a way to balance what little time I have with preparing most of what we eat from scratch. It is definitely a learning curve, but we will keep on trucking--sardines and all.
On the bright side, we are still eating healthy colorful dinners. The problem is, I am spending hours in the kitchen. Tonight supper took me an hour and a half to prepare. The kicker is it was fish. Who the heck spends an hour and half on fish? While it was tasty, it was not filling and now I am eating a bedtime snack (which is allowed under the plan). I have also just spent and hour making my grocery list for our weekly shop tomorrow. Grocery shopping used to take us--or Jeff and the kids I should say cause they were the ones doing it--about an hour. Now it takes two hours and that is with us dividing up the list. The list is long and because we shop at an inexpensive grocery store, it is hard to find substitutes for the ingredients not available at that store. If we do the shopping at a store where we can buy things like Quinoa, Tahani and Mori Nu tofu, we end up spending well over $300. I am also bummed because I found out last night on a TV show that the sandwich meat I was buying is not as healthy as I thought. I don't want to name any product, but there is a brand of meat which lists the ingredients as lemon juice, sea salt and cultured celery extract. In case you don't know, cultured celery extract is just another name for nitrate. In fact this meat is no more healthy then the obviously bad for you kind. Another Sigh.
So what is a slightly postpartum depressed--tired--hungry--sick of being in the kitchen--mom to do? No I don't have time to go to three different stores to get the stuff I need ( This includes going to a store with a deli or an actual deli) So no more lunch meat, Jonas will be so disappointed. Peanut butter and jam is out too, as Jonas' school is seed and nut free. Jonas will just have to survive on leftovers. I have decided each week I will just buy a roast beef or a chicken, cook them in my crock pot and use that for Jonas' lunch meat. I am also going to try cooking several things at the same time--like roasting beets for a later in the week salad when I bake the sweet potatoes for that nights meal. I am hoping this will save time at least later
in the week. I am also going to splurge on a veggie tray..They are obviously more expensive then buying whole veggies and cutting them yourself, but the time savings is valuable. Plus, you have the advantage of always having fresh prepared food ready for a snack. I am a huge fan of grab and go food. It also helps to remember that it is just as easy to make a lot of something as it is to make a little. In other words, its just as easy to cook nine chicken breasts as it is to make four, so the leftovers can be used in a salad, a wrap or my kids favourite on a pizza. I am really open to other suggestions any of you may have to save time and money so please feel free to post your tips here or on my facebook page. If you prefer you can message me your tips and I will post them.
At the end of the day, I must remember that this is a lifestyle change, not a diet. There is no going back. I will find a way to balance what little time I have with preparing most of what we eat from scratch. It is definitely a learning curve, but we will keep on trucking--sardines and all.
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